The Long walk To Justice

the long walk to justice
Go and make your voice (or ping) heard. Now. I did.

Clueless

It all started when I was curious to find out what was so great about Star Wars: Knights Of The Old Republic. It was hook, line and sinker for me. I am COMPLETELY immersed in the game. Now, I have 2 games to get for myself. Preferably Christmas, since I'm too old to be entitled for any gifts from anyone(though I encourage the spirit of giving! :P) Thanks to Vinny and Jerome for getting me into the game!

As a result, I have baggy eyes, radioactive skin (due to late night gaming sessions) and have turned myself into a somewhat of a hermit. I was inclined to say 'geek' or 'hobbity-geek' but, meh.
Which is not a bad thing considering I'm surviving on a shoestring budget till my pay some time June 5th. Why does it take this long to get my hands on my "hard" earned cash? Well, my boss has this habit of being very... uncooperative in the financial issue. But let's not talk about that shall we? Last thing I need to get worked up for this old man's issue when it's not even worth my effort to do so.

Define shoestring budget:
Where I can only afford to buy 1 bun a day or not buy anything and rely on the office's biscuit's and coffee or tea for the duration of the working office hours, bank account is completely drained, and having to suspend my excursions till I can afford petrol and set my communication mode to receive once I have run out of credit.

I know, I know, there are others who are in a more worse situation than I am but please, this is my own personal space! Let me whine as much as I want. Which also happens to relate(somewhat) to another topic. As HK-47 puts it:

"Warning: Touch the master's blade and lose an arm, meatbag!"

In other stuff, It's been some 3 months(?) since I talked about getting my guitar fixed, cleaned and tuned and getting myself a digital tuner. I still haven't gotten it done. Mostly I dont have the budget for it or I forget and when I remember, I realise I have no budget for it, again.

And I had forgotten to post pictures of my progress on the construction of my PC's custom case. Again. Here's some the earlier pic's I wanted to post:

And that is all there is for today. May the Force be with you.

Incoherent 101

Why is it that I feel like it's not worth doing? This, I mean. Life, people, emotions (damn emotions). This. It's annoying. I feel like what I do aint worth the effort.

I sure as heck ain't gonna go suicidal. It's just. Annoying. Its annoying me that I have this nagging thought of being left out.

I'm counting on blogging this down to get all this off my mind and my flat, muscle-mass deprived chest. It had better. I'm starting to get easily annoyed, extremely short attention spans and just plain nastiness.

*Darkside points gained*
Just when I had a nice pic to upload, the batteries died out on me. *teeth grinding* I so want to Force Crush a living creature now. Maybe not kittens
*Eee, bias!*
*choke, die*

Dashboard Confessionals - for You To Notice (Live MTV Unplugged)

This makes no sense

Please bear my incessent ramblings.

I've been feeling tired. Not just tired, the "there isn't much to live for so why the bloody hell do I even bother to try?" tired. Sound suicidal. 'Fraid so. Though I'm too much of wuss to even nick myself.

Sissy Nick: OOH! AAH! OMG THE PAIN! OH THE PAIN!

Emotionless Nick: Oh, shut up will you.

Sissy Nick: But the pain!

*Whacks Sissy Nick on the head*

Sissy Nick: ...

I've been reading some of the comic's from these guys:

Pretty good stuff. I had a knack to draw once but C programming killed it. Not to mention my sudden addiction to PC games. I wonder where I kept my old "sketches". Actually they're more like senseless doodlings. But, what if, i could draw again? Hmm...

I think it should be even better than me trying to write something with an isi(as in got something good to read, instead of this senseless babble). I am infected with some sort of writer's block, as Mac calls it.

not only that, My worst part is short attention span. Very bad. I'm trying to refresh my 3D modelling skills for class tomorrow and I don't have that 'feel' anymore. Back when I was doing my thesis, I literally handled the whole 3D project myself. *joyful beam* Of course as with any project, I had to do the reports but thankfully, my group leader kindly and selflessly handle the documentation part. Of course I still type down the materials she needed.

That time, you can see me staring at my monitor, cigarette in my mouth, hands on keyboard and mouse, and the occasional swearing. At 5 in the morning. And if you look into my waste basket (I'm not sugestting you do!) there would be at least, 10 packets of Nescafe regular packs.

Donnolah, what's wrong with me ah? Anybody know? Is this some sort of mental diesease I am not aware of? Or is this just me going through a phase?

Sacarstic Nick: A 'phase'? at that age? Oh PUH LEESE!

Me: Shut up ass wipe!

Sacarstic Nick: Make me.

Me: Grow up.

Sacarstic Nick: Did you?

Me: Argh!

Anyways, started on my case mod already. SEE?! I cant even focus on a topic when I blog! Dang it! *sigh* Oh well... Anyways, tomorrow's the 16th so...

Happy Anniversary Love!

Back to work. Take care guys.

My Favourite Colour is NOT yellar

You've made a yellow Lightsaber

Yellow is the color of Honor and Loyalty. It
symbolizes caution and foreboding in either
direction of the blade, Meaning that the owner
is relatively cautious...but also to be
cautious of them. Since Yellow stands for both
Honor and Cowardice, Once should always think
twice before attacking someone with a Yellow
Saber.


What Colored Lightsaber Would You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

Is it just me or is the image insanely huge?

Your Deadly Sins

Greed: 60%

Sloth: 60%

Wrath: 60%

Gluttony: 40%

Lust: 40%

Envy: 20%

Pride: 20%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 43%

You'll die in a castle, surrounded by servants.

How Sinful Are You?

A 43% chance to go to Hell?

The True You

You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to do more for you.

With respect to money, you spend as little as possible.

You think good luck doesn't exist - reality is built on practicalities.

The hidden side of your personality tends to be satisfied to care for things with a minimal amount of effort.

You are tend to think about others' feelings a lot, perhaps because you are so eager to be liked.

When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you don't have any particular type in mind, but you are inclined to look for someone who will say yes when you ask him / her out.

Who's the True You?

You are

What Rejected Crayon Are You?

I tink ar...

You Are 55% Normal (Somewhat Normal)

While some of your behavior is quite normal... Other things you do are downright strange You've got a little of your freak going on But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

How Normal Are You?

This is Freaky

You Were Actually Born Under:

Resourceful and practical, you are a quick thinker. You are very observant - and it's hard to get anything past you! A total perfectionist, you are especially picky about looking your best. You're a big dreamer - such a big dreamer that reality can disappoint you. You are most compatible with an Ox or Snake.

You Should Have Been Born Under:

Resourceful and practical, you are a quick thinker. You are very observant - and it's hard to get anything past you! A total perfectionist, you are especially picky about looking your best. You're a big dreamer - such a big dreamer that reality can disappoint you. You are most compatible with an Ox or Snake.

What Year Were You Born Under?

Gotta go, need to set up 15 PC's for 1st Silicon's class tomorrow.

Raining

Ah Monday... There's perfectly nothing wrong about it of course, it's just that I'm still in my holiday mood and I hate going to work in that kind of mood. Also, I have fully recovered from my perpetual headtrip/stoning/OMGworldisspinningohwaititsonlyme.

First things first.

To Will, thanks a bunch. Looking foward to next Gawai at your kampung again. To Leon, thanks for introducing me to Night train! WOOHOO!

You see, Last Wednesday i.e Gawai, I went over to my Will's kampung to celebrate. Though yes, I am a Bidayuh myself and yes I do celebrate Gawai, though on a much smaller scale, i.e, family gathering and barbeque at my grandpa's place in Kuab(or is it Kuap?)(that's my kampung's name)

Minus the beer/liquor.

Anyway, there's the food and the beer. Lamb curry is excellent! And so is the bamboo chicken! :D Put my stuff up stairs since I was staying the night. Went visiting with the parents around a few other houses and the last house we went to served tapai! (local liquor)

By the time we got back it was already 9 in the evening. Much later on, another friend of ours came by for a visit and stayed till like around midnight. I think I've must slept at about 6 in the morning.

Woke up around 9 (cant be sure) cause Will woke me up. And next thing I know, we were smoking hand-rolled smokes and drinking cold beer in the hot morning. On an empty stomach. For breakfast. And that marked the beginning of my adventure in perpetual headtrip. I must've downed 3 cans of it because the day was just hot. Then went down to escape the heat and had some food(lunch time by then) and had more beer. It was hot and apprently, I was bought in by the theory mentioned by a friend of mine that drinking beer helps to alleviate body heat. So, with that in mind, and a hot day to boot and playing cards to pass the time, I think I had another 3 more cans before I had a shower. Boy, mountain cold water feels good! Raven and Shook were already in the house when I got out of the bathroom and The first thing she said was: "Nick, Hi. Do you remember me?" Wow, I must be looking that stoned to get that question! :D

Felt much better after the bath and had another can when Mac and Azreen arrived. Ziggy, Will's elongated dog (which in my mental state looked like a furry grey sausage) was the star of the moment. Hey, cute dog what... Mac's younger brother who we also called Mac got lost on the way but managed to find the place. Sat down, talked, had fried chicken wings (which goes well with beer) and a smoke, and with the whole group together, Will brought us out to the nearby water fall. Took plenty of shot's there. Will had a swim while the rest of us were either:
a: Climbing rocks
b: taking photo's
c: drinking beer
d: any combination above.

Photo's here

Note: I was still perpetually high.

Had a group photo before we head back and split up. Mac, Azreen, Raven and Shook head back to check up on the kitten and a shower before meeting up at Leon's place.
The other Mac stayed behind with me and Will. Had dinner, packed up and met up at Leon's place. Gerome, Mac and Azreen were there already and a while later, Raven and Shook arrived thus completing the circle.

Note: Still perpetually high at that time.

There we were, we being Leon, Will, Raven, Shook, The Other Mac, Gerome, Azreen, Mac and Will's significant other. To get the ball rolling, Leon open up the Night Train, and man, that is one good liquor! Then we had Tequila. This is where my headtrip went gaga. World is spinning, tequila in me throat which by the way, is what tequila does to me. It tends to stick to my throat like it's gonna come up, even after the orange drink and lots of plain water. Listening to chill out music from The Other Mac's repertoire and taking advice from Raven and Mac does alleviate to some extent. I had to leave much earlier though, cause I was bumming a ride back home. There is no way am I going back on my bike in that condition! Had another bath and pass out. Thing is, there doesnt seem to be any hangover's.

Nor was I feeling thirsty.

Meh.

Gaming on Neverwinter Nights does however keep my focus, and avoid family disgruntles. Yes, From Friday till Sunday I did nothing much except playing Neverwinter Nights.

Second,
I got upset and dissapointed at some of the things that Terence and his significant other had told me a few days back. Though it made me feel embarrass for troubling them, hey, history's history. No point staying there but to move on and hope and pray that it wont happen again. Also the issue has been adrressed and resolved. Now, on to reading Order Of The Stick!

P/S: RWMF coming soon. Me Bailey's is still waiting...